Five days in

I’m five days into what I refer to as “the expulsion.” I am not sure what to call the massive amount of bleeding that occurs during a miscarriage. I was so ready to get on here and brag that I was no longer using a diaper pad. But the light days pad lasted a shorter time than it took to vacuum the upstairs of my house. I really thought it was slowing down. I hadn’t had huge issues all day. Dare I say, I was really only spotting. So Lightdays pad, here I come. False. So very false. I’m ready for this stage of miscarriage to be over. I think I’m getting over that hump of thoughts of the miscarriage constantly on my mind. Unfortunately, this bleeding reminder brings my thoughts back to the situation. I’m looking forward to Tuesday, when I will discuss some of those questions that have been burning in my mind.

On another note, I finally told my mom. She said exactly what I thought she would say. But it really helped to tel someone who has been through it before. But, since she raised me, a lot of our thoughts are similar. I have to believe God has a plan and he has reasoning of why he needed my baby in Heaven with him. And now we have our own little angel watching over us, growing up with God. It’s a cool thought, and very comforting to know the baby is in good hands. I wont lie, though. I’m really hoping and praying God’s plan for us includes at least one more baby.

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